The Jersey Boys : Big Adventure

Contributed by Tom Philippi, Wilderness Systems Pro Staff

It was a hot July weekend and Peeler, Tink, Shovel and Ned were finally going to get their chance to fish the famous Slapaheine River in central Pennsylvania. The Jersey Boys had been planning this trip for well over a year, ever since they saw a YouTube video posted by their idol, Skipper Stickbait. Skipper, or Skippy like his close friends like to call him, is well known in the kayak fishing world, particularly when it comes to the brown bass found in rivers. The Jersey Boys had never fished a river in their lives and this would be their first point-to-point trip as well. Ned, being Ned, had a detailed itinerary outlined on all of his computer devices including his smart-phone and I-pad as well as the GPS’s in his truck and kayak. Tink and Shovel were not too impressed with all these new techno gadgets and Peeler couldn’t care less as long as they were gonna get a chance to fish.

The Boys did have some experience with smallies. There are a few lakes in their south Jersey area that have smallies stocked. These are not the super-charged brown bombers found in rivers but they can still tug a line like nobodies business! These few experiences had the Boys raring to get on the river!

The 4 boys did spend an enormous amount of hours watching videos about river kayaking and river fishing. These including every video they could find of their hero Skippy. There was some concern by Shovel about how well his Hobie pro angler was going to handle the rocky areas of the Slapaheine, but he was still willing to give it a go. Shovel shops in the big boy section so even a Pro Angler sits low in the water when he’s aboard! Tink felt that his 10 foot kayak was the perfect vessel for river fishing and he was willing to bet some big money, well, not money but fishing lures. Tink and Shovel bet 5 brand new Japanese crankbaits that each would catch the most brown bass. They had a separate bet for lunker which included dinner that night at whatever fast-food restaurant the winner chose. That was a significant bet for these two best friends!

While Ned was busy strategizing the exact route they would all take down river according to the most recent satellite pictures as well as the most recent info on water levels, Peeler was looking closely at the water to see if there was any of the “bug hatches” that he had been reading about in some fly fishing magazines. Peeler HATED bugs because they all LOVED him! Peeler was also very concerned with the apparent lack of any shade along their proposed route to point B. He was into his summer tan which was the color of an egg shell, dark by Peeler standards! He was beginning to wonder how much bug juice and sunscreen he was going to need to last this trip. Peeler recently bought a Kayak Kaddy to carry his skin care products. You just never know. Peeler also had a new idea this season that seemed to make sense…he planned on using all kinds of added scents to his baits to counter any contamination. Peeler had Pro-Cure gel, Bio-edge wands as well as Yum F2 and Gulp spray-on attractants. There may be an oil slick following behind Peeler’s kayak but at least half of it was gonna attract bass!

Shovel was less worried about any conditions they may encounter on the river; Shovel always managed to catch bass wherever he fished. He was much more concerned about getting something to eat as soon as they left the river. Shovel did not tolerate missing a meal and he had his ever-present spoon attached to his belt with a chain, just like bikers attach their wallets. This spoon was large enough to double as a one-handed paddle in a pinch. All of the boys watched Skippy’s videos and they realized that a few were actually filmed on the Slapaheine River. Skippy went on and on about how well tubes caught smallies. All 4 of the Jersey Boys were loaded for bear with different sizes and colors of tubes. They all decided that many smallmouths were gonna have their lips pierced today!

They did not get the early start that they were hoping for. Ned had more difficulty than expected with his GPS. Seems the mountains in this area reeked havoc on his reception. When they did finally drop of one truck at point B and trucked back up to point A, they quickly unloaded their kayaks and gear, went through a checklist and donned their PFDs. They were off!

The start of their river trip covered some gentle current with smaller boulders spread out but clearly visible. Each angler started chucking and pitching their lures at any structure they came by, just like they would in their home lakes. Peeler was the first one to hook up and boy did that nice smallmouth get all of their attention! As Peeler screamed like a 12 year old schoolgirl, the brownie took off on numerous runs and jumped about 3 feet out of the water on several occasions. The group was cheering him on the entire fight and when the smallie was finally in his possession they applauded his fine skills! Good thing Peeler almost always uses a Lip Gripper. He had so much gel, grease, oil, spray all over himself and his gear that there was no way he could have held on to a slimy bass as well! The three other Jersey boys gladly took several Hero shots of Peeler with this 19 inch smallie, then helped him send it back into the river.

Ned had a real hard time getting used to river fishing early on. Ned is totally obsessed with his electronics and when fishing his home lakes he often paddles around while only watching his down scanner screen. This did not work well on a river. While Ned was staring at his fishfinder screen he would run into rock and rip-rap every few yards. After several very close calls, the other boys were able to convince Ned to turn off his electronics and just FISH! As soon as he did, he started catching bass like a pro.

Shovel did bend his turbo fins a few times but they were easily straightened out with a little gentle love and a pair of plyers. Shovel did bring a regular kayak paddle, a specially made 290cm one, that made his life easier and his fishing much more productive.

Tink was in his glory! Never much of a paddler, he just kind of flowed with the river and ended up catch more bass than anyone! This was the first time in anyone’s memory that Tink caught more than his buddy Shovel. Tink is not a big fan of carrying alot of different color plastic lures. He prefers to carry white lures and then color them himself with the multiple Spike it markers he has hanging from his PFD. He is a regular Picasso when it comes to lure coloring and he made his tubes either life like or maybe obnoxious enough to piss these bass off!

The Slapaheine definitely lived up to it’s reputation. They all agreed that it may have been the best fishing any of them had ever experienced! To top off a great day, they even ran into none other than their Hero, Skippy Stickbait at the end of their trip! Skip was finishing up a TV shoot when the boys just happened to paddle around a bend. Not realizing that there were cameras rolling, the Jersey Boys went “Ike” and started yelling and cheering Skippy’s every move. Skip knew real fans when he spotted them and graciously included the Boys in his show, even interviewing them about how their trip went. Before leaving they all had Skippy autograph their kayaks!

Later that evening, sitting around a huge pile of burritos and tacos, the boys were able to review their day. Shovel picked Taco Bell because he caught the lunker for the day, a beautiful 22.5 inch citation smallmouth that almost caused him to turtle in some rapids. Shovel was so focused on his fighting this bass that he did not realize he was running across the river and when drifted into the rapids he was way off balance. Quick thinking and the use of his huge spoon saved the day and a whole lot of his equipment!

Ned did not turn on his electronics the rest of the trip and did not only catch more bass than he ever had, he also could not believe how beautiful and scenic the river was!

Peeler caught the first bass and many more during this trip. No hatches were encountered and he was able to survive with 90% of his skin intact! His Kayak Kaddy was worth it’s weight in gold and from that trip on, Peeler would never fish without one.

All vowed that this would be an annual trip for them and they were anxious to share their experiences with the rest of the Jersey Boys Kayak Fishing Club!